how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
