yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
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