is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Randomize