A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
