There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
