It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
My underwear smells like fireworks.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
