Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
