Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
