He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
