i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
