"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Randomize
