love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
