I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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