Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize