Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
