He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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