i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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