turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
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