oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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