I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
