I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
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