take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
