There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
