ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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