To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Acid is not a monday night drug
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
