hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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