I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
