Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Randomize
