please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
