shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Terrible idea I love it
I'm both gender and math confused
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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