sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
