He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
