Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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