Screwed.edu
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
whose ass print is on the piano?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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