i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
