were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize