You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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