That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
