just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
