office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
