sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Help. Why am I so naked?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize