she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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