hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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