Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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