Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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