that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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