I hope mine doesn't look like that
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I would fuck him just for his dog
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
