Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
