They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Randomize
