Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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