I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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