There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
