no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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